Calming Critters

March 12, 2017Uncategorizedpet love, routinespaulabourque

slice-of-life_individual Routines keep me going when things get hectic and occasionally overwhelming. Monday mornings especially, are driven by routine to get me up and out of the door and ready for my day. Getting in exercise when I feel like I’m just too busy, is helped by the routine of walking at lunch and snowshoeing after school. But one of my favorite routines isn’t to help me stay task-driven- it is to help me STOP.

Weekend mornings I grab my cup of coffee and make my way to the couch. All I need to do is sit…and they come! The snuggle brigade. I have two cats and two small dogs and they all vie for a spot on my lap. My only “task” is to keep my coffee from splashing on all of us.

At first it is a flurry of furry activity, but as I wait they each settle in and find a spot on, beside, or behind me. The dogs sigh a deep cleansing breath. The cats curl their paws in and close their eyes. I am “trapped”. I can’t DO. I can only BE. It is only when that coffee cup needs refreshing that I even contemplate a move. Even then, I don’t worry because upon my return from the kitchen, process repeats itself.
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And so I savor this Sunday morning with my fur babies. I can’t imagine life without my calming critters.

These Go to 11!

March 11, 2017Uncategorized#SOL17, inspiration, memes, quotespaulabourque

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11 is my favorite number. (It’s one better than 10.) I’m also an unrepentant Spinal Tap fan!

Inspired by top 10 lists I offer you 11 (one more than 10) of my favorite inspirational quotes. Don’t under estimate the power of an honest, uplifting message to stimulate someone’s thinking, reframe a challenge, and energize the weary. I love to collect quotes and reflect on the deeper meanings and implications beyond the ‘simple’ phrase that serves as their container. There are many more than 11 uplifting quotes, for sure. I’d love to hear what resonates with you!

Screen Shot 2017-03-10 at 8.46.50 PM — #1

Screen Shot 2017-03-10 at 8.48.52 PM — #2

Screen Shot 2017-03-10 at 8.49.53 PM — #3

Screen Shot 2017-03-10 at 8.51.28 PM — #4

Screen Shot 2017-03-10 at 8.47.12 PM — #5

Screen Shot 2017-03-10 at 9.02.31 PM — #6

Screen Shot 2017-03-10 at 9.07.49 PM — #7

Screen Shot 2017-03-10 at 9.07.22 PM — #8

Screen Shot 2017-03-10 at 9.04.13 PM — #9

Screen Shot 2017-03-10 at 9.01.30 PM — #10

Screen Shot 2017-03-10 at 9.05.05 PM — #11

What messages or memes inspire you?

A Welcome Break

March 10, 2017Uncategorizedpaulabourque

slice-of-life_individual My girl is coming home today! Her spring break and my spring break don’t align, but I don’t care. She’ll be home.

I must say her first year at college has flown by and we’ve adjusted well. I think it helps that she is healthy and happy and successful with her studies. A year ago I could not have imagined what life would be like without Bailey here each day. I refused to let myself think about it much because I didn’t want it to get in the way of enjoying those senior year moments.

The most difficult time wasn’t even driving her to school, lugging everything she owned up three flights of un-airconditioned stairs, or even kissing her goodbye and driving away. To be sure those were emotional and they challenged me to be strong, but she looked genuinely happy and that is all I could’ve asked for.

The moment of truth for me, however, came hours later. My husband and I drove the long “labor-day-weekend-of-traffic-into-Maine” ride reminiscing. We were feeling content with the life we had built together and so proud of our amazing kids. When we got home, I walked upstairs to put my things away and stopped outside my daughter’s room. I opened the door and looked at the empty. And that was how my heart felt, too. I sobbed. Not the sniffly, trickling tear… but the ugly cry. The one where your face gets so wet, your sleeves can’t soak it up fast enough and your shoulders shrug uncontrollably.

It didn’t last long. Within a few moments I was exhausted and spent, but I knew I’d be ok, because she was ok. Later, I sent her a text to say goodnight. I’d read all the advice about letting them contact you first, but that was just stupid! I’d always said goodnight and I wasn’t going to stop then. We exchanged texts during the next few days as I tried to piece together her new life in my mind.

The days turned into weeks, which turned into months, and here we are. Each time she comes home, my heart soars. I love hearing about her studies, her dance team, her friends. Our time together is more precious than ever. So today I’ll walk with a lighter step, I’ll talk with a smile on my face, and an ache in my arms that are ready to wrap around her.

Here’s to a wonderful break.

Making Writing Visible

March 9, 2017UncategorizedAuthor Visits, Lynn Plourdepaulabourque

slice-of-life_individual Yesterday one of my schools hosted kidlit author Lynn Plourde. If you don’t know Lynn and her books, you really should. A former speech therapist and educator, Lynn’s books are full of whimsical word play and rich characters, and her presentation to students is spot on. She’s got the teachers’ touch, for sure.

I first met Lynn when my daughter was starting kindergarten. She came to share her debut picture book Pigs in the Mud at my daughter’s school. Now Lynn doesn’t just read her book, she gets the kids to LIVE it. With simple props and lots of enthusiasm everyone tells the story of a muddy road full of animals in rural Maine. My kids were enthralled and I’ve been a fan of her work ever since.

This year, Lynn published her first middle grade novel, Maxie’s Secrets: Or What You Can Learn From A Dog . I think this will introduce a whole new audience of readers to her talent and showcases her range that also includes nonfiction, graphic novels, and a ‘love letter to the state of Maine‘!

When I wrote my own book (Close Writing) Lynn was one of the authors gracious enough to talk with me about her process and let me share some of her ideas and thoughts about writing. She has attended nErDcamps to share ideas with teachers as well.

Lynn has a blog Make Writing Visible where she shares some techniques teachers can use with their students-a virtual author’s visit! She is a true writing mentor!

I know KidLit authors are rock stars to me. I learn so much from them as an adult, I can only imagine what it would have been like for me as a child to meet a real life author. I desperately wanted to write to Astrid Lindgren (author of the Pippi Longstocking books) but at the time, that wasn’t anything my teachers could help me with. Authors today have never been more accessible. Teachers can help connect kids and authors via Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Email, or even Skype visits. (And there’s always good old snail mail).

Students left the library at our school today not only inspired, but eager to write. It’s my wish that every child gets opportunities to connect with the authors who fill their libraries and open their hearts and minds. I want them to get insights into the process and ask questions that will lift their thinking and elevate their writing.

Let’s look for opportunities to make writing as visible for our students as possible. Let’s give them this slice of a literacy life.

Lessons We Shouldn’t Have to Teach

March 8, 2017Uncategorizedshelterpaulabourque

slice-of-life_individual This Monday was a typical Monday morning… until it wasn’t.

I’m hanging out in kindergarten with some ‘budding scientists’ who are talking about shelter as a human need. They are discussing houses, apartments, and even tents they’ve used as shelters. One child raises her hand, “They even have shelters. They’re for people who don’t have shelters.” This led to the acknowledgment that not everyone is lucky enough to have a home of their own and so it is good that we have places called shelters. This could have been a mature enough conversation for 5 year olds, but sadly we had to turn to an even more grave matter. We had to shift our concept of shelter significantly.

At 9:30 we were scheduled to practice a lock-down drill. The teacher was amazing in her matter-of-fact handling of a potentially terrifying topic. She reminded them where to go, hide, and basically hunker down until we got the “all clear” message. She reminded them to stay quiet and not move around.

The first questions were easier to answer.”No, we can’t use the restroom. Yes, you can get a drink after. No, just leave your things at your seat.”

The next, not so much. “Well, sometimes we just need to practice things to keep us safe. We have to be quiet so people won’t know we are in here.”

Then questions were replaced by thoughts and fears spoken aloud. “Well, if a bank robber came and bank robbed our school we have to hide so he doesn’t rob us.” “Well if they hear’d us they could come and get us.” “Who?” “What if they hear us?” “What would happen if they see us?”

Then came the announcement to lock down. We calmly walked to our hiding place (which I won’t disclose) and scrunched ourselves down to be as tiny and quiet as possible. No one giggled the way 5 year olds usually do. They looked around at their teachers and each other. The teacher practiced her whisper roll-call.

It was then I noticed two little boys with their eyes closed and their hands in a Shuni Mudra pose. They were using a calming, in-the-moment exercise their teacher had shared with them. It was beyond adorable.

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Looking at these sweet children and thinking about what we were doing struck me as so pathetic. How heart wrenching it was that we had to take time to teach our students how to avoid being killed or injured by intruders in our schools rather than engaging in more math, literacy, science, or even mindfulness. This is not a lesson my college prep, student teaching, or even 30 years of experience prepared me for. It was a lesson learned from the tragedy of others that I pray we are never ‘tested’ on.

I hope that those quick to judge schools and teachers so harshly are one day enlightened as to the tremendous responsibility we embrace in raising these kiddos-body, mind, and soul, and can appreciate how difficult that can be some days.

Namaste.

Slices Enough for All Guests

March 7, 2017Uncategorized#SOL17, Slices of Lifepaulabourque

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A Series of Fortunate Events

March 6, 2017Uncategorized#SOL17, Diaries, Journalingpaulabourque

fullsizeoutput_6266 I have been keeping a journal for most of my life. It started with small diaries that locked with the simple key (that could be substituted with a fingernail). When I was young they would fullsizeoutput_6265 capture what time I woke, what I ate, the score of the Cubs game, and a sentence or two about my day. An entire week of my life could fit on a 2 page spread. I liked the repetitive nature of their entries and the simplicity of my days.

By middle and high school I graduated to full-page diary entries that often captured my scores on tests or other grades, how volleyball, basketball, or softball practice went that day, and who I sat by at lunch. Riveting reading, no doubt.

There are gaps in journaling over the years when I couldn’t (or didn’t) find the time to document those moments of my life. They marched on regardless. On the verge of motherhood, I knew I wanted to capture life and contain it somewhere so that I wouldn’t forget. I began incorporating photos, ticket stubs, and other mementoes with my entries. Now they are half images, half words on most days.

Each time I fill up a journal it feels like closing a book on a part of my life. I flip back through the 7 or 8 months that are captured within and relive moments, feelings, tastes, and sounds. There is something sacred in finishing a book and knowing that it represents the memories of the past and then opening a blank book and recognizing that it holds the promise of a future.

So today I sit here between past and future with a blank book in one hand and a pen in the other. I am closing the book on a part of my life and beginning another. My life is more than a trilogy, quadrilogy, or heptalogy…

I guess I don’t know what you call 20 or more books. fullsizerender

Perhaps, A Series of Fortunate Events?

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Random Acts of Zen

March 5, 2017Uncategorized#SOL17, Being in the moment, zenpaulabourque

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My life is full. At times I admit that it is busy. I believe that life is not a rehearsal and we are allowed one shot to ‘get it right’ so I want to experience as much as I can and try not to waste it. I strive for a sense of harmony with work and play, and I am lucky that my work is mostly a great source of joy for me. I stopped thinking about “balance” as being equal distribution of time and energy, but embrace it as more of a consonance between work and play.

What I still still struggle with however is “being in the moment” and fully present with whatever I am doing. I am much better with this than I’ve been in the past, but it is definitely a work in progress. I’m sure we all do it. I find myself planning lessons in my head while taking a walk, remembering to reply to an email while working on my National Boards, checking on the progress of April the Giraffe while watching a movie with my family. To be sure these are little things and I am able to get back on task rather quickly, and in some moments I don’t really mind.

fullsizeoutput_6247 — Sometimes Zen opportunities trot across my backyard.

But there are some moments, new experiences or instances of awe, when it is easy to be fully present and focused and attentive. It is during these moments that I feel most connected to this life, to this time I am given. These moments can come out of the blue and if I am not mindful I might dismiss them or they can be planned and savored. I see them as opportunities to be awake and engaged and present.

I often say to myself, “This.” This is my signal to engage with what I am experiencing, to call on my senses to raise my awareness, to focus on the slice of time before me. I consider these moments of ZEN. To me, Zen involves seeing and experiencing things without the distortion created by my own thoughts. I try to let the experience wash over me and not filter it through past experience.

To be sure I do not walk through this life in a perpetual state of mindfulness. But when I get these Zen episodes I use them as a gentle reminder that each moment is really a gift if I stop to acknowledge it. What makes my life richest are often the things I forget to notice, that I take for granted.

So I am grateful for reminders. I continue to practice. I strive to be present. And I don’t criticize or chastise myself when I am not. I know that every moment offers a new opportunity to tune in and zen out. I know that “slicing” helps me with this practice. All month I am tuning in to life experiences with a heightened sense of awareness and gratitude. I am embracing random acts of Zen.

I hope that slicing helps you with this practice as well. May you all find moments of zen in your day today.

Documentary Poetry

March 4, 2017Uncategorizedpaulabourque

slice-of-life_individual Last September my daughter Bailey moved away to college. As anyone who has gone through this knows, the transition in your life is profound. For 17 years I was a part of her daily life and she, mine. Knowing that growing up and growing apart is normal and that she is happy and succeeding is a sign that our parenting actually worked, helps a bit. It’s still change, and change can be hard.

I wanted to find a way to share our lives with her beyond our texts, video chats, or phone calls. I wanted to remember this year for the important time it was. Not only were changes going on in our personal lives, but unless you’ve been hiding under a rock, you might have noticed some major shifts and events in our country as well.

She’s busy studying and building a life. How can I succinctly share my life with her each week? How could I document events, reactions, emotions, hopes, concerns in a way that doesn’t overwhelm her? …….POETRY.

With an economy of words, poems can express so much with so little. Poetry encourages me to reflect on the significant ideas I want to share and captures a point in time I want to remember. My poems aren’t great. They are frequently quick writes and not revised. But they are a “from the heart” correspondence each week that I send to her and I keep a copy in a book that will memorialize our first year apart.

So as I blog this month, I will share some of these poems. They are truly Slices of My Life in this year of change. Here’s an example of a slice in our year:

Nevertheless, She Persisted

Reading a letter

From a time not distant enough

From a woman not honored enough

She was warned.

Speaking the words

That were relevant then

That are relevant now

She was given an explanation.

Challenging the privilege

Of the old white man

Protecting another old white man

Nevertheless, She Persisted.

And so we carry on with our lives, and I write to remember. Here’s to Documentary Poetry!

Finding Myself in Hot Water

March 3, 2017Uncategorized#SOL17paulabourque

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I love to find myself in hot water. It’s my moment of zen. And it’s my hot tub.

Actually it’s a hot tub in name only…literally, a tub that holds hot water. Don’t imagine a spa with jets and bubbles that massage tired muscles. It is a 30 year old hand-me-down sans bells-and-whistles, but it is my space to connect with nature and the “wild Maine nightlife”.

Each season I feel more in touch with the natural world because of my time here. And each year these moments become more cherished.

In winter the atmosphere is so dry and crisp that millions more stars become visible. The night sky is alight with twinkles. I watch satellites float across the expanse. I catch shooting stars streaking through the black. I pick out constellations as they journey across the winter sky. The blanket of snow reflects the moonlight so brilliantly that at times it feels more like day than night. And the quiet-it is oh, so quiet. Only interrupted by an occasional snowmobile, coyote, or fox in the distance.

In spring the sounds begin breaking through the sleep of winter. My ears ache to catch the first peeper of the season. An owl hoots from the woods across the field. A woodcock’s nasally peet calls at dusk and the drips of melting snow can be heard long into April.

Processed with Snapseed. In summer the days are longer and twilight tends to be my hot tub time. I watch the sunlight cling to the tops of trees. Orange and pink compete for the landscape of the evening sky. I wait to see which robin will be the last to sing out as I watch the fireflies begin their dance over the field. I hear the giggles and shrieks of neighborhood kids allowed to stay out late. Sometimes a rumble or a flash will cut short my time, or my kids and their friends want me to share, but I don’t mind.

In autumn I note the changing silhouettes of the trees as they become near-naked week fullsizeoutput_565 after week. The air grows cooler and the water feels warmer. Twilight comes earlier so my dips become darker and I stare at the horizon waiting for the arrival of the harvest moon. Life becomes busier and this time more precious.